Danger of the dayjob
(Let me preface this with, no don’t just quit your job when you don’t have a backup plan. The economy is shit, and I wouldn’t want the stress of being poor to befall you. There’s nothing cute about struggling so that you can create “real art”. This blurb is more about settling when you have bigger dreams you’re racing towards.)
When I was scrambling to find a job, I picked up temporary gigs working for conventions. On my second day, I went upstairs before my shift to work on my screenplay such a cliche, I know. As I jotted down plot points, my focus was interrupted by a temporary coworker who wanted to introduce herself. She gave me her name and her spiel on her positive experience in the temp space. She said she’s been working for the last 15 years and finally worked her way up to more administrative positions (aka sitting positions).
She must’ve sensed my mental eye roll.
For her praises for the company ceased. With a red face, she quickly said her goodbyes and started her shift. Was I being an asshole? Yes, I was. But through experience, I realized I had to burn bridges and shut down these notions early on for my own sake.
While not all day jobs are soul sucking, excelling as a model employee is sure to give a comfort that ensnares even the most ambitious of artists. I am not the exception, unfortunately. As a type-A person, who wants to excel at everything, I had to learn some tough lessons about priorities.
After obtaining my bachelors I was already working retail with a promise to keep the course and work on my writing. My resolve started strong but then the employee discount kicked in. Before I knew it, my focus and funds went towards playing the part of a good sales rep. All my plans for writing went by the wayside, and I started experiencing an emptiness that I couldn’t explain. My flawed thought process was that I could make art when I was more financially stable. What a foolish thought! Today’s most coveted artists, with personalized Cinderella stories, were jotting down lines on their commute to work, sketching during graveyard shifts, and filming during lunch breaks. Why was I not doing the same?
Now that I have a masters degree, I am yet again kicked out of the college bubble. Luckily, I am working a few day jobs that are pretty fulfilling. However, things are different this time. I have a better understanding of my flaws and I have more outlets to keep me focused on the larger picture. A quote I like from Theworkingartists.com is:
“Your art doesn’t exist to support you, you exist to support your art.”
How beautiful it is that we’re able to make things in any state (financially, mentally, emotionally, etc). With enough effort drip fed into your projects, and not your monthly quotas, you too can be a new coveted Cinderella.
Currently, I write this on a Google doc during a bus commute. I’ll clock in at 6:00pm to be an usher for a tourist attraction. But I’m so content because I know, these days in the minimum wage trenches are temporary and they shall be treated as such. ***
